Worrying Woes

First--no, no China news! 92 days and counting...but hey--the days not over yet!

This post is simply to vent a little. For those who don't know, my little Ella is one of approximately 12 million people who suffer from food allergies. While I am fully aware that she could be afflicted with far worse things, the truth of the matter is, food allergies are responsible for about 30,000 Emergency Room visits and claim the lives of about 200 people each year. In relation to other conditions, that number may be small---unless one of those 200 was someone you loved. For no explainable reason, food allergies have doubled in the past 10 years. Ella is one of about 1.8 million people with allergies to Peanuts and Treenuts. Unfortunately, her allergy is life threatening. Her very first reaction was an anaphylactic reaction in which her throat was closing. At 2 years old she had put a cashew in her mouth, spit it out, and within minutes had no voice--her larynx was swelling. Luckily, while we all had no idea what was occurring, someone was watching over her and her condition did not progress to the point that she couldn't breath. The thought of what could have happened that day is unbearable. Although the hives and fiery red rash she was covered in for several days following that incident were a reminded of what could have happened, we were blessed with just "a warning". Now, armed with an Epipen, my search for any and all information food allergy related began. Sadly, I would find little comfort in what I read. Somehow food was now a potential enemy, but not only food. There would be many other hidden hazards---in soaps, in lotions, in hair products, in makeup and in cleaning products. The thought that my little girl could accidentally ingest something and her throat could close in 1-2 minutes became my most haunting thought. I struggled, and still struggle, to find a balance between stressing the importance of being careful with what she eats, and scaring the hell out of her.

So here we are today. I have learned everything I possibly can in order to understand her allergies and protect her. This knowledge however is not enough to comfort my constant worries. There is a part of me that worries everyday about her. Aside from the obvious, I worry most about her feeling different. I hate that she has to have "her own" food and "her own" cupcake at parties. I hate that she is restricted in the restaurants she can go to and the foods she can eat there. I hate that her allergies have the potential to disclude her from certain activities at school where food is involved--which was an issue just today and what initiated this post. All the while I hide from her how my heart breaks for her every time she can't be just like her three year old friends and I make a constant effort to make her feel like its "no big deal". I try to find the right way to teach her how to protect herself without making her allergy a handicap. We got through Halloween, which is by far the most challenging day of the year, but now there are new worries as we approach the Holiday season. Can she eat the food at the parties we go to? What safe dessert will I pack for her? Will there be nuts out at the party? Will someone enjoy their delicious nut filled cake or brownie and then leave residue in a place where she'll come in contact with it? Will a kind well intentioned person offer her food she can't have while I'm not looking? While other people just don't understand the severity of the situation, I wonder if I'm looked at as the "neurotic mother". That however is not something I worry about. I have to be the neurotic mother. I have to be vigilant. I have to protect her.

So today my thoughts are with all the other moms who struggle everyday to keep their children safe from something others look at as just a basic necessity--food. To those who know all too well that most people "just don't understand". Those who are fellow "master label readers" of everything, not just food. Those of you who, once again, told their child that they couldn't eat something they wanted because it could make them sick. Those of you who spend the school day praying your child will be safe in someone else's care. Those whose daily accessories are a bottle of an antihistamine and an Epipen. Those of you who pray that you'll know when to use that Epipen and you'll administer it before it's too late. Those of you who have, or will have to look into your child's eyes when they first come to the realization that the food they're allergic to will not only make them sick---it can kill them. Those of you who pray daily that the reason for this rise in food allergies will be discovered and one day there will be a way to prevent or cure them. Those who know that no one ever intentionally eats a food that can trigger a fatal reaction----it's ALWAYS an accident, and therefore everyday try to prevent that accident from occurring--try to predict if there is any way possible that the food your child is about to eat may have be cross-contaminated.

While I wish that a life threatening food allergy was not a part of Ella's life, I am also so very grateful. Grateful that her allergy is just to peanuts and treenuts, unlike those with multiple food allergies which make the normal task of eating a nearly impossible task. I am grateful that she is otherwise healthy and that although she has something that is a bit of a disability, she is not handicapped by it and does not have a condition that causes her constant suffering. I know that there are worse things, and I thank God that it is not one of those things we are dealing with.

Happy Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving to all of you who read this blog. Some of you are family, some are old friends, some are new friends, and some of you I don't know. I just wanted to wish each of you a Blessed Thanksgiving. I am grateful to each of you for the love and interest you show by following along in our journey. Happy Thanksgiving!

85 Days......and Counting

Today marks 85 days waiting for LOA. Great Wall has said that they usually get LOA's between 85-90 days. So does this mean we're truly in the home stretch?????? Can I say with confidence "any day now"??????? This has all taken so much longer then anticipated and yet there's still a little part of me thinking "wait, I'm not ready yet!!!!" Not that I'm not dying to finally see that sweet little face in person, because I sure am. Not that I'm not longing to met the son I already feel is mine. There's just that little voice pestering me with all the things that still need to get done. For example, A NAME!!!!! I know it is driving some of you crazy that we haven't decided on what we will be calling our little guy. Please be assured that it's driving me crazy too!! I'm waiting, and waiting, and waiting to say a name and have it feel just right. Maybe with LOA will come some sort of divine inspiration. I can only hope! In the meantime, in case there is a name that I haven't come across in the two baby name books I have, I up for suggestions!

85 days......and counting! Any day now!

Magical Memories

Over the summer our vacation planned were suddenly derailed when the timing would have prevented me from having our dossier documents Certified and Authenticated as soon as I possibly could! Out of guilt for turning our vacation into a day trip into the city while I went to the State Department and the Consulate, we told the kids that we would take them to FL in November. So off we went on Saturday as promised. Of course, out of everyone, Ella enjoyed this trip the most. She loved EVERY minute of. She loved the landing on the plane, she loved the shuttle ride to the baggage claim, she loved the hotel room, she LOVED EVERYTHING. It was so much fun watching her take in everything, living in the moment, and getting pleasure out of things others wouldn't even notice. We crammed A LOT into four days, and did as much as we possibly could in that time. Needless to say we were all exhusted by the time we arrived home at 11:45pm Tuesday night. Here's our trip in photos!

A couple of "weird things" happened while we were away! The first was while we were on our flight to Orlando. Sitting next to Brianna was a woman and sitting behind Brian was her husband. They were VERY friendly and told us all about their college aged children and their current vacation plans. During our conversation the wife mentions that they live in the town where I used to work and she asks us where we live. We told her we live about 40 minutes away from them in @*#&$%. She then says "I think I was just in @*#&$% on Tuesday". She tells us that she was on her way to another town with a client and made a wrong turn and remembered seeing a sign saying @*#&$%. She then goes on to describe the development she turned into and guess what---it was OUR development!!! As she's describing the neighborhood Brian is sitting there smiling and she says "you live there, don't you???" Yes we do!!, Brian tells her!! With that I take Ella to the bathroom. I get back and Brian turns to me and says "Melis, she's a speech pathologist". I look at her and say "Oh, I'm an Audiologist and I used to work in your neighborhood" (for those of you who don't know as an undergraduate your degree is in Speech Pathology and Audiology and you then chose one of those for your Master's degree). She then says to me "I took a little bit of a different route and mostly teach sign language now". Shocked, I say "Oh, we're adopting a little boy from China who may be deaf, I might need you!" She then replies "Oh wow, I do private work too. I go to people's houses and teach the child as well as the family sign language. We do things like go to the park, or out to a restaurant and learn all the relevant signs---and now I know where you live!" Needless to say I was temporarily speechless. All along I have always strongly felt that Wen was probably hearing impaired, but not deaf. I compose myself, turn to Brian and say "Well, I guess maybe he is deaf". What are the chances????? Did God just plop this person into my life because I really am going to need her??? And she drove past my house just the other day????

Second "weird" thing--later the same day we're on line to see the famous mouse. I look behind us and see a women with a little Chinese girl. I point her out to Brian and as I do I realize the mother looks really familiar. I'm trying to place her and then realize it was a women, who I don't know, but who's blog I followed the entire time she was in China!!! I remembered her whole story, and both of her children's names. Of course I went over to her to let her know that although she's not a celebrity, she's been "spotted" and tell her that her daughter is just as beautiful in person as she was on her blog! Brian just stood there shaking his head. Again---what are the chances????

Being my first attempt at a slide show, please forgive any spelling/grammatical errors in this post. It's taken me too long to finish it and I just can't proof read and "fix" another thing!!! Off to make dinner for a hungry family!

Happy Halloween!!

This year Ella had a very difficult time deciding what she would be for Halloween. She changed her mind several times! She finally decided that she'd be a giraffe. She LOVES giraffes. We had a beautiful day to trick-or-treat and as always we did it with Ella's best friend and boyfriend Mikey. Jason went around with a group of his friends and came back with a sack full of candy. Brianna who is too old to get dressed up, but apparently not to old to want candy, did go out with her friends dressed basically like themselves!

Ella stood still two days in a row, first for her school Halloween party and then for Halloween, while her face was painted
The cutest giraffe ever!!!



They're all ready to go get some candy!
The boys. J is the one with the B@rt mask on. He kept it on for about one block!
El sharing a ride with her best friend
Poor Meg trailing behind!
Ella asked Mikey to hold her hand as they walked back toward the street. He always takes such good care of her!

Mom and Dad with their little "Giraffie"

Super, Soggy, Soaking Wet Monday

What do you do when it looks like this outside your window??????

You have a movie party with your friends!

Can you stand these two little buddies holding hands??? Ten years from now we won't be letting them even sit next to each other!!

What better way to spend a rainy afternoon.......
Than watching a movie full of fairies and flowers!

Two Bedrooms Done!

Brianna and Ella's rooms are done! Two down, two to go! I just love the way they came out. Luckily, so do they! Next, Wen's room. Just have to figure out what the heck I'm doing in there-- any suggestions are welcomed :) Then, since everyone else was getting a new room, I told Jason that we'd repaint his room. I hope I'm not sick of painting by then! Here are the girl's new rooms:

El's New Room

B's New Room

Pretty purple bathroom